The Last Fort

As I type this early Friday morning, my oldest son's alarm is going off (or "going on" as my literalist children insist). This is the day my oldest son has been yearning for since last August (takes after his father in that regard) as the last day of school is finally upon us.

And speaking of endings, the picture you see is Kael's last fort before summer hits & everything in his life is turned upside down.

I spent some time with him in the cozy confines of this shelter yesterday afternoon. We visited safe inside over a dimly lit flashlight & a slice of processed cheese, while his younger brother climbed in & out of the garrison (as you can see in the picture if you look close enough).

The moment certainly didn't last long enough.

It's no secret my heart is heavy these days. Big changes (& one particularly scary test) are staring our family in the face. Meanwhile, Kael turned five last week & our brief time together under his makeshift blankets represent his final days at home before summer's tumultuous arrival, followed by his start of school in a few short months.

As mentioned in a previous post, I must go away now for a while. So this shall be my final blog for a season. Last day of school. Last post. Last fort. How the years pass us by.

Bitter Sweet

Not terribly long ago, the little squeedunk you see pictured, enjoyed his second birthday. In a few short days my next to youngest will celebrate his fifth birthday. While this is no doubt cause for celebration, I confess it's entirely too sobering & overwhelming for your favorite blogger & mine. Simply stated, it's all ...Going. Too. Fast. 

If you should happen to locate my "life's remote" (so to speak) lodged under my proverbial worn out pee stained sofa of life, please I'm begging you, hit the pause button.

Alas...sigh...it would seem everything in this life I want to savor is ripped out from underneath me at record pace, while the things I despise have a never ending shelf life. Perhaps this is simply part of the curse. You know, for the same reason weeds need zero care & will easily take over a yard. But if you happen to want carfefully groomed Carpet Grass, prepare to toil & shell out benjamins only to see the unforgiving Texas heat burn your fleeting investment to a crisp by mid June.  Even Leviticus warns "All your work will be for nothing, for your land will yield no crops, & your trees will bear no fruit." 

Nice.

I realize most of my blog entries for this year have been anything but sunshine & lollipops. But life isn't very doable & certainly not enjoyable under the current circumstances. And there is very little I can do to alter the sitch. Overzealous reader wanting to be encouraging while not dealing with all the facts: Oh yes there is! Chessking: Oh no there's not!

What's worse, in the very near future, I must go away for a time. I plan to keep a daily log in a little green cheapy notebook during my leave of absence. If anything interesting comes of it, I'll be sure to share. Don't hold your breath. I know I won't. *Double sigh*... :0/  

The Iron Lady

I freely admit I'm not much of a movie watcher these days. But there's a special place in my heart for Great Britain's finest jewel. So off to Redbox I went. ;0)

Conclusion: I've never seen a character more accurately portrayed. Meryl Streep... wow... there are no words.

An enormous ally of the United States during the final days of the Cold War, Thatcher represents the very best of our Motherland in my discerning opinion. I have such fond & distinct memories of her standing side by side with President Reagan during the course of the 1980's, & will never forget her endearing eulogy at his funeral in June of 2004. Now in the sunset of her remarkable life, I am deeply saddened to see such a resilient, steadfast woman, become so frail. But we know aging & health problems never discriminate.

As the years pass her legacy will only deepen. But I am particularly encouraged to know her carbon copy currently resides in Wasilla, Alaska. 

   "I think we have gone through a period when too many children & people have been given to understand "I have a problem, it is the Government's job to cope with it!" or "I have a problem, I will go & get a grant to cope with it!" "I am homeless, the Government must house me!" & so they are casting their problems on society & who is society? There is no such thing! There are individual men & women & there are families & no government can do anything except through people & people look to themselves first. It is our duty to look after ourselves & then also to help look after our neighbour & life is a reciprocal business & people have got the entitlements too much in mind without the obligations. -M. Thatcher

Take Me Home

Always been quite attached to this tune, as it elicits fond memories of summer vacations in hot & humid Southeastern Oklahoma, circa mid 1980's. During that time, the song received frequent airplay on Tulsa's very own K107, which also happened to employ my favorite D.J. of all time, the (now) late Jan Elizabeth Degan (best known as Jan Dean), God rest her soul. On this live version, the auxiliary percussion are beyond terrific at the onset, but what Sir Phil is able to accomplish using the masses as his echo chamber/personal choir, near the end is nothing short of extraordinary! Jouir!

Hope Deferred

'm not gonna lie to ya, this year has been anything but proficient & life giving. Now we're practically 3 months into this thing & it would appear any light that might be had at the end of our otherwise elongated, dismal tunnel, is without question...an oncoming train.

Talk about "Swing & a Miss".

I pray anxiety levels reduce in our household just as bloody soon as our mountains are sufficiently relocated.

Wow, this is a boring blog entry. And you're still reading because why? ...(crickets)

On a side note, it would also appear I'm suffering from writer's block. Perhaps that's why I haven't been around lately. Alas, sad birds don't sing. I think it was Churchill who once stated "When you're going through hell...keep going".

Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a dream fulfilled is a tree of life. Proverbs 13:12 New Living Translation

Mr. President, They Have Daughters Too

Stop This Train

This past week was one of the more difficult weeks of residency (particularly for my wife & children). We currently find ourselves with little to no reserves at this hour while like you, staring a new week in the face. Which brings me to tonight. I typically don't do well with birthday reports, as the milestone usually leaves me in a frustrated, melancholy state of being. Nevertheless, while our current circumstances are anything but ideal, you can't put a price on the act of four children rushing around like mad (in your absence) baking you birthday brownies to surprise you with upon your return.

I wish I could somehow bottle nights like tonight & savor bits & pieces of it at various future dates of my choosing. They are quite simply a welcomed oasis in a desert of discouragement.

I suspect some day, when I am nearing the finish line, I will reflect upon these freshly made memories with even more appreciation than I currently possess. If only there was a way to slow the hands of time. Please oh please God, stop this train.

Didn't We Almost Have It All

Like countless others, I was profoundly saddened to learn of the passing of perhaps the greatest female vocalist in pop music Saturday night. Whitney Houston not only represented my generation, but also performed the finest rendition of the National Anthem in the 1991 Super Bowl by which all other National Anthems will be measured. Admittedly, I'll never fully understand why stars on Houston's level seem to pass before their time. That acknowledged, candles burned at both ends may burn twice as fast, but they also burn twice as bright. R.I.P. Whitney. Now you belong to the ages.

With Me All The Time

Came across this recording I had forgotten about so I thought I'd share. It's a simplified, acoustically driven arrangement of my song "I Am Not Afraid". I recorded it on the fly right before we left Houston in Twenty Ten, as I was needing much personal affirmation at the time due to our uncertain future. I always enjoy performing this tune in a live setting because the lyrics are so encouraging & edifying to our faith, plus it's loads-o-fun to play if you happen to have a gifted percussionist on hand (& boy do I!) to add some tasteful egg shakers or delicious light metal brushes on the head of the snare. Hope you enjoy, & hope you share with others. -cW.

Pictures On The Floor

Upon the arrival of our new home in Summer of Twenty Ten, I was struck late one night by the visual of pictures leaned up against our wall on our floor. Anyone in the world could look at that & know they weren't where they were supposed to be. Anyone in the world would also know that wasn't their final destination. So it is with us. Transitions are risky & uncomfortable to say the least as the unknown can be a terribly frightening thing. But that doesn't mean we're doing something wrong. One way or another, we're all in transition. Is it safe? No. But what is?

Of Gloom & Discontent

'ts 2:25 a.m. as I write, & I regret to inform you your favorite blogger & mine is up late...& not because I want to be. Truth be known, I find myself a bit overwhelmed, accompanied by great bouts of uneasiness. Unhappy with a variety of areas of my life at this time. Hopefully, like an excruciating gallstone, this too shall pass. Time will tell. And speaking of time...can you tell me what is wrong with the posted oil painting picture of the new Ward family clock? Look closely & amuse yourself while I waller in my gloom, & discontent. :0/