Then I Saw Her Face...

A two hour "Squatch Party" at the Ward household went down last night (via the Animal Planet Channel Special "Finding Bigfoot"). Say what you will about these creatures, but I for one am leaning more toward their existence now than ever before. When thousands of reports are well documented, certainly, there will be nut jobs & creative attention seekers there in the midst. But the other 4,376 can't all be wrong. Furthermore, the Western Civilization was not made aware of the Giant Panda Bear until 1869. Shyeah...how do ya miss something like that? When I consider the fact that over 70% of the Earth is unihabitable for humans (Houston included), It leads me to believe there are countless places we have yet to adequately explore. The Congo in Africa comes to mind. The area today is plagued by civil unrest, which creates (am I boring you?) its own problems for easy access. Explorers also report great difficulty in moving even a few feet at a time through the punishing terrain while trying to combat thousands if not millions of mosquitoes (again, reminiscent of south Houston). The area I am told is enormous (the size of several Midwest states lumped together). There are reports from the natives of what we would consider to be modern day (don't laugh now!) dinosaurs still in the most remote swamps of the area. Well...why not? It's certainly big enough to house & hide such beasts. We know there are man eating sized snakes alive & well in the South American Amazon River region. How laughable & far fetched does that sound? Next thing you're gonna try to tell me is they've found snake like creatures in the ocean that actually omit electricity, or squirrels that fly! Not to mention we also keep discovering new species of Ape, Fish, Bird, you name it, every year. While you're rolling your eyes at me, I might as well add insult to injury & share with you my theory on "Nessie". I believe the legendary Loch Ness Monster was a Plesiosaurus but is most likely dead, or it moved on when humans began permanently inhabiting the area (as the lake was mostly undisturbed & quite difficult to find before modern roads etc. made it accessible). Reader: But Chessking, don't you know dinosaurs lived millions of years ago? Chessking: On April 25, 1977, a Japanese fishing boat pulled up a rotting...a rotting...ummm...a rotting one of these things...(here, have a look-ee see!)http://www.gennet.org/facts/nessie.html One would think the scientific community would be all over this. But no! As it smacks in the face of evolution, which demands dinosaurs dying out twenty bazillion years before Lady Gaga was doin' her thang. So alas, it gets swept under the carpet & intellectualized away as a "basking shark". Whatever, dude. The book of Genesis clearly says man, not dinosaurs, ushered death into the world. So how could things have been dead before the Adam & Eve show was in full swing? Reader: Now Chessking, you don't seriously believe we all came from one dude with his family in a giant boat with a slew of smelly livestock, do you? Chessking: I have a much easier time believing that, than believing nothing exploded, the earth cooled, rocks eventually grew legs, gave birth to gator like creatures who over 150 billion years gave birth to monkeys, then later great, great, great, great Grandpa (ooze from the sea, swing from a tree, & then there's me!). As they say on ESPN just before the big Monday Night game "C'mon man"!!! There are also countless ancient works of art from civilizations & tribes all over the globe that depict hunters spearing a spot on T-Rex. Guess they didn't get the memo from modern day text books that dinosaurs were gone long before we arrived. But alas, I digress. I could debate/pontificate for hours on this subject & Mrs. Chessking & I even have a hoyty-toyty theory concerning Bigfoot that I'm a hair reluctant to share. Perhaps that should be saved for my next blog entry as I have dinner to prepare & Pumpkins to carve, teeth to rot, etc., etc., Stay tuned, stay safe this All Hallow's Eve, & thanks for reading! cK.